I remember the exact moment I first felt old. It was about four years ago, and I was having dinner in my hometown with two high school friends. At the end of the meal, we passed the bill to see how much we each owed. Jessica had her reading glasses on a necklace and lifted them up to read the check. Michelle held the check at arm’s length to read it, and I took my (long-distance) glasses off so I could see what I needed to see. We looked around the table, realized what had just happened, and grudgingly admitted that we had all gotten old. The eyes are the first things to go.
Now, plenty of things make me feel old. My worsening vision and other physical ailments aren’t going to get any better. Life events, like sending the first kid off to college and meeting my daughter’s first boyfriend, take their toll. But one particular landmark birthday every Gen Xer I know dreaded is looming– by the time this column comes out in The Voice, I will either be 50 or nearly there. As my half-century mark looms, I’ve spent the past few months thinking about what tropes of middle age I’ve embraced, and which I’ve rejected.
Though I still wear my beloved band T-shirts, in the last two years I’ve gone from owning one polo shirt to owning, and frequently wearing, half a dozen. The olds like their polo shirts. Though I’m still listening to a lot of new rock bands and seeing live shows, my jazz collection has increased exponentially. I once swore to myself that I would never listen to jazz, a genre I felt was for old people, but a switch flipped about five years ago, and now jazz is a Sunday morning staple. In my 20s, I only read nonfiction books under coercion. Now I read nearly as much nonfiction as fiction, and those books are often my favorites of the year.
Yet some things really haven’t changed, and I’d like to think that if I’ve made it this far into middle age, they never will. I still prefer riding my bike to driving my car. My cycling actually increased significantly in my 40s. I still read comic books, watch cartoons, and play video games. Mac and cheese out of a box and ramen are still my go-to comfort foods, even if I buy slightly fancier brands now. I also still drink Kool-Aid! Kind of. Now I call it “getting my electrolytes,” and the flavored sugar is much more expensive.
Will I end up shaking my fist at the youngsters going too fast on their electric bikes, or rolling my eyes in exasperation when I see more and more AI-generated content? Too late! I’m already doing both of those things. When it comes to aging, sometimes it’s fine to be ahead of the curve.
I am not relishing turning 50, but I’m not dreading it either. I am accepting it, and I’m grateful that I’m as healthy and active as I am as I enter my 50s. I will go into the next decade with the same attitude I had when becoming a parent: Roll with the punches, and most importantly, keep my sense of humor. Now where is my AARP membership? I’m ready for some senior discounts.
Eric J. Perkins writes about Gen X for The Belmont Voice. When he’s not writing, he’s the Director of Transformation at Addgene, a life sciences nonprofit in Watertown.
